Blokes...why is my boyfriend doing this?

my bloke used to be such a romantic when we first got together, bringing flowers to my work, taking me on secret picnics, whisking me away for days out, sprinkling rose petals on a hotel bed we used, very generous with gifts. he's not like that at all now. he is lazy, i do everything for him. i have asked millions of times why he cant be romantic and he said hes not a romantic person and he only did those things at the start of the relationship to keep hold of me. now we live together. hav been togetehr 2 years. he says he loves me and that should be enough but a girl needs more than words right?


i feel i am banging my head against a brick wall. a necklace he got me for our 1 month anniversary that i never removed broke the other week and he wont replace it. he knows i am heartbroken about it but he says he cant be bothered to go all the way to the shops to get a new one. he said i can hav the money and buyh one myself! i love him alot and he promises he loves me. what can i do?

Blokes...why is my boyfriend doing this?
I have to say I think all of us women love a bit of romance and we see it all over the place and expect our men to be like that!! Unfortunatley in real terms this is not often the case!!





My boyf from the beginning has told me he finds all that sort of stuff hard - talking about his feelings, showing affection and says he just isn't romantically inclined. However he knows I love a cuddle now and again and just a wee 'I love you' or unexpected kiss - I spoke to him about all this and he now makes the effort to make sure I know how he feels. We made the point of seaking about it and he realised how it makes me feel when he does nice things - I don't mean he has to buy me gifts or things but just small gestures which make me feel great!!





Try talking about it to your boyfriend - maybe he was a bit ott at the beginning and now can't keep it up as he was sooo romantic. I think we would all love our man to be like that but in reality if they love you and can show that now and again I don't think we should expect too much!!
Reply:sounds like a loser with a capital L....he needs to make an effort once in a while so finish it with him he will soon realise what he has lost and will come running back with flowers and a secret picnic in the park
Reply:Sorry but he has already told you. He said that he is not a romantic person and that he only did those things at the start of your relationship to keep hold of you. I guess then, that is his reason.
Reply:It's a lack of respect. you see in the begging of a relationship guys are so kind and different because we want to respect you but when its go long enough we stop because you have become a piece of property. we feel we have done it long enough for you to stay.But hey take a vacation but don't cheat on him if you really like him or love him just go out to the country side spend a week end a way some times we get to crowded as well so hope i helped.
Reply:Believe it or not we all try to be our best first off, male and female, but after a while our true self comes out, if what you have now is not what you want, and i am sure it's not then i think it is time to move on, i was in a situation like that, the affection was not there and i could not live without that, some things you cannot do without, and i was not talking about the sex, don't think it will get better because i doubt it will, it is up to you.
Reply:I used to be like that too.


My then g/f got fed up and left.


We cant be romantic all the time, but he needs to make an effort from time to time.


Make him choose between the sofa and you!
Reply:this is not only with your bf all the bf think opposite from girl. I donot also know that what moov in their mind. My bf is also opposite myself but it is true that he loves me very much we fall in love from 3 yr. and he can do anything alse for me. In a bf and gf there shoulf be believe, confidence, adjustment. only then they can meet otherwise there be fight continuously
Reply:Men will do anything to win your heart over so they make the effort and then after a year or so they get complacent so they dont buy flowers or do sentimental things .Its important to feel loved and wanted and he should replace your necklace as it means alot to you .You need to sit and have a talk about how you feel and that your not happy .
Reply:This is very typical when the romantic love seasons into a relationship. l have the same situation.
Reply:I have been with my partener now for two years. Within the frist 6 months we got engaged it was all lovey dovey, very sweet. I think it's the same with many realation ships. That first spark starts to fade you just need something to relight it. I know my pertener is very sweet and doesn't show it like he used to. He tells me he loves me and I believe him. Just say it back. Go on a date and do something romantic hopefully it will bring the sweet guy back out in him. remember your not alone, alot of other girls go through it too. x
Reply:he has his feet under the table , so to speak. no need to make effort now he has you
Reply:I really don't think he's you guy. You may want to look at your future... if what you currently have isn't what you want in the future... then you should end this relationship and start moving forward.
Reply:The honeymoon period of the relationship is over.





You now have to decide if there is enough love to continue into the future.
Reply:Hi.





You've said you have tried talking to him but.....Have you actually advised him of how much it hurts? Maybe you should ask him if he's really happy with you because if he isn't then he should stop wasting your time.....Its not fair on you!





Maybe you should say to him that, he isn't the man you met %26amp; if things continue then you may have to go your seperate ways......It may make him think twice.





Wish you all the best





(edit)





He obviously doesn't care about how you feel.....If you've spoken to him about this %26amp; he STILL insists he isn't romantic.





Has he blamed it on anything in the past such as.......Works been tough, Feels a bit low, Tired etc etc etc...........





At the end of the day you matter too, it isn't all about him....For all you know you may be giving him just what he wants. He may thrive off the fact that you are a little insecure at the moment........Dont give him the Satisfaction.





You have your needs too so, make sure you make it clear what you want from the relationship too.....Dont let him think he has you over a barrell (so to spk)





Good Luck
Reply:ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Reply:Ever seen the Break-Up with Jennifer Aniston in it? If you haven't, I highly recommend watching it as you are in a similar situation.





Play hard to get, girl. You can do it... keep him on his toes and be mysterious. Men love women who are mysterious! It will all work, in no time he'll be at your feet - and you'll be like "roll over, sit, stay". Ask him to do anything, and he will.





Good luck.
Reply:Does he show you he cares about you in other ways. What you are talking about is pretty materialistic and I agree we all want a bit of romance - but you are talking about gifts constantly. Would you be happy if he never talked to you, treated you badly but bought you an expensive gift every week or a bunch of roses? Look at the bigger picture - it's not realistic. The beginning stages of a relationship are the most exciting without doubt - but by no means the most rewarding. Enjoy living and being together - of course he should be romantic by cooking you a meal every now and then as should you. You mention nothing of romancing your boyfriend?


Your boyfriend has made a rod for his own back by pretending to be something he is not - this is the REAL man you are dating. Does he treat you well enough to let the constant romance slide? Only you can decide that. You will be lucky to find a man who keeps up a romantic facade a year into a relationship - however on the rare occasion they do surprise you it means a lot more!!!
Reply:It sounds like the honeymoon period of the relationship has ended. If you still love this guy and he loves you, this is my take on the situation.





Everything in life goes through season change. At the beginning there is Spring, flowers, fireworks, you look into his eyes when you eat.





Then came Summer where you include your friends and families into the relationship.





After that, came Autumn, where you get comfortable, like moving in together, you get into routine.





Finally came Winter, this is where you realize he is not the same as before. This is the time where both are internalizing their priorities. You need to do this for yourself too. Question would be, what do you want to achieve for yourself and include him in your plan.





But don't worry. What happens after Winter? Spring! again.


Most people breakup during the winter season and start a new relationship with another person and yes, Spring again. It is not the person. It is the season. Get through the seasons of the relationship. You will grow to be better couples.



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